When meeting an author for the first time:
“You’re a little scary sometimes, you know that? Brilliant … but scary.”
— Ron Weasley (Stone)
When training a new marketing assistant to write copy:
“The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.”
— Albus Dumbledore (Stone)
The successful candidate for business manager, during the interview:
“’I know some things,’ he said. ’ I can, you know, do maths and stuff.'”
— Harry Potter (Stone)
Authors, when compiling an index:
“I’ll be in my bedroom, making no noise and pretending I’m not there.”
— Harry Potter (Chamber)
When training a new acquisitions editor:
“It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”
— Albus Dumbledore (Chamber)
The work student, leaving at the end of the semester:
“Dobby is free.”
— Dobby (Chamber)
Marketing, explaining why a well-known author’s trade book tanked:
“Fame is a fickle friend, Harry. Celebrity is as celebrity does. Remember that.”
— Gilderoy Lockhart (Chamber)
The editorial committee, when pointing out an error:
“Turn to page 394.”
— Snape (Prisoner)
When selling foreign rights:
“Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open.”
— Albus Dumbledore (Goblet)
When a job candidate is asked “why a career in publishing?”
“I think we’ve outgrown full-time education… Time to test our talents in the real world, d’you reckon?”
— Fred Weasley (Order)
When journals and book staff converse:
“Don’t worry. You’re just as sane as I am.”
— Luna Lovegood (Order)
When a copy editor gets to use MLA style instead of Chicago:
“I mean, it’s sort of exciting, isn’t it, breaking the rules?”
— Hermione Granger (Order)
Acquisitions editors, when dealing with tenure-track authors:
“There is no need to call me ‘sir,’ Professor.”
— Harry Potter (Half Blood)
Copy editor’s note, when changing an author’s phrasing:
“Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.”
― Albus Dumbledore (Hallows)
Authors, when reading that same copy editor’s note:
“Once again, you show all the sensitivity of a blunt axe.”
— Nearly Headless Nick (Half Blood)
Authors, protesting when the copy editor removes the “U” in “colour”:
“I’ve always wanted to use that spell.”
― Minerva McGonagall (Hallows)
Marketing, when questioned about their use of social media:
“It is the quality of one’s convictions that determines success, not the number of followers.”
— Remus Lupin (Hallows)
University presidents, when asked about their continued support for university presses:
“After all this time?”
— Dumbledore/Snape (Hallows)
“Always.”
